I feel 100 percent. Need a dick in me, but that’s probably n..

I feel 100 percent. Need a dick in me, but that’s probably not going to happen today. Everyone is busy. I did rub one out this morning. But that isn’t going to cut it. I need something fat and long inside of me, trying to split me in two. You know what is funny? I have noticed when I’m horny, I sit wide-kneed. Legs spread like a dude. Go figure. Chalk that one up to Mother Nature. I know you guys don’t understand the need to have a cock inside of oneself, and I don’t expect you to. I mean, I get why you want to put your dick in me, but I have no idea what that urge to do so feels like. For me, when I have the urge to feel a dick in my holes, it’s like a gnawing in my belly. I need to feel a fleshy, stiff rod moving things around inside of me. It’s quite the urge. To the point I sometimes make bad choices to scratch that itch. The payoff of dealing with it is pretty good, though. If I have to wait to have sex…when I do…watch out. It’s going to be explosive. That’s where I’m right now. Hopefully, tomorrow will be the day I fulfill that urge. Fingers crossed.

I remember a joke from a while back that goes, “Egyptian kids had no idea that one day their daddy would become a “mummy.” Talk about predicting the future. And no…I refuse to pretend biology doesn’t exist just so nobody’s feelings get hurt. As much as I would love to have a nine-inch sperm-chucking cock planted just above my clit…it isn’t going to happen. No matter how much I want everyone to believe it. The best I can do is keep pumping my clit full of Testosterone and hope it gets as big as humanly possible.

Whoever put the “S” in “Fast-Food” is a marketing genius. Some of you will have to really think about that one for it to make any sense.

What is the hardest part of riding a Scooter? Explaining to your parents that you are gay. Just kidding. Kind of.

How stupid do you have to be? All these women running around saying they want a guy who is “sensitive, attentive, caring, good-looking and fit and can never find one. Why? Because all of those guys already have boyfriends. Plus, who wants a guy who cries more than I do? And I don’t cry all that much. I get the good-looking and fit part, but sometimes, that requirement is more of a hassle than it’s worth. Guys like that spend more time and money on getting themselves ready and on “Personal Products,” which is just another term for makeup for men. I’m fucking ready to head out the door in 10 minutes or less. I want a guy who is willing to comb his hair in the truck and wash his hands when we get where we are going.