Where’s Rob’s dick when I need it? Fuck. I know I had to can..

Where’s Rob’s dick when I need it? Fuck. I know I had to cancel on him when I wasn’t feeling well but fuck…I need that fat cock to resize me…like yesterday. I feel too tight. Here’s a weird thing. Even though it’s not super comfortable, and sometimes painful, I’m getting hooked on the stretched-hole state he leaves my asshole in. I like the way he gapes my pussy…I like it a lot. But my ass, that is on another level. And it lasts for days. I can’t even use a butt plug several days later because it just falls out. I know. You're thinking this chick is messed up in the head. Maybe I am, but I’m too old to care. I like what I like, and it just so happens that I like walking around feeling and knowing my ass would be way too stretched for most men. That old saying, “Is it in yet?” pops into my head, and knowing that would be a true statement makes me leave wet spots in my shorts. Now that I have worked Ryan into a position where I can start getting him to do things he isn’t comfortable with, I want him to slip his dick in my ass after Rob opens it up and laugh at him because I can’t feel it. Holy moly. I like that so much that it makes my chest feel funny.

Regarding Ryan. I hate it when people text you 50 times before you even answer the first one. Ryan…jeez. One after the other. The last ones came in around 4 am this morning. Up all night texting me stuff. I haven’t even read them yet. I’m sure he thinks I “broke up” with him. That’s kind of hard to do when we were never really a thing. Fuck buddies. That’s about it. What’s the good news in all of this? I own this guy now. He has shown his hand. He will be lucky if I don’t make him fuck himself with a dildo while I watch. Which now that I said it…I kind of want to see it. It’s so delicious to watch the shame on a man’s face when he degrades himself in front of me while I watch and rub one out. Especially when I know they don’t want to do it, but they can’t stop themselves…they need me to touch their dick that badly. Like I said yesterday, he’s an addict; I’m his drug and his dealer, and that is exactly how I want it to be. The good news for him is that if he’s a good Brooke addict, he will get what he wants and needs. The bad news is the price he will have to pay to get it. I have finally found a spot for Ryan in my life…hope that makes him happy.

Someone asked me why I don’t go to conventions anymore or hang around with porn people. One, I’m way past my time on being relevant in those kinds of things. I am yesterday’s news. Not too many relevant people want to hang out with me. Two, I’m not really a porn people person. They aren’t thrilled with me, I’m not thrilled with them. It’s nothing personal. I just have different views on life. I am uninterested in hanging with people who drink, medicate, or smoke; way past the point where I’m comfortable with being around. That right there kicks me out of the cool club crowd. I don’t care what they do…I just don’t want to be around it. It never looks fun, and I have never seen anyone at their best when they are hammered on whatever it is they choose to use, drink, or smoke. You end up babysitting half the time when you’d rather be grinding dick. I find hanging around with the average Joe/Jill is way more exciting. Plus, listening to porn people is repetitive. I know what they are going to say because I have done it. We have nothing exciting to tell each other. It’s not interesting anymore. I’d rather hear about the time someone was working under a house and ran into a badger. I heard that last week. I still laugh about it. And I enjoy telling adult stories to people who are truly excited to hear them, so there’s that.